Doing hard things

I spent most of the last 8+ years trying to make my kids' lives safe and easy: cutting their food, holding their hands, kissing owies...you get the picture.  I felt that I was doing the right thing; being a good mom.

But life isn't full of safe and easy.  And often times, we don't get the choice or the chance to make things safe and easy...and what happens then?  I started to think that maybe I was doing a disservice to my kids instead.  Not that I would ever intentionally put them in harms way, but I started thinking about the life lessons I was teaching (or NOT teaching) them.  

You see, I have boys.  3 of them to be exact.  3 white, upper middle class, English speaking, male offspring.  I started to think, didn't they have enough advantage in life? I began to wonder how could I make them appreciate and not abuse or take for granted this privilege that they had not earned...but rather been born into...

When we moved to Denmark, we knew it would be hard on the boys.  But because of my earlier revelation about privilege, I welcomed the difficulty.  I realized that, for the first time, my boys would get to experience (albeit on a much smaller level) what it would feel like to be an outsider...a minority.  I hoped beyond all hope that they could take this opportunity as a life lesson and learn about empathy, understanding, privilege and inclusivity.

When we arrived in Denmark and picked schools for the boys we chose the public school route.  Whenever someone asked me where they went to school, I got curious looks and then I'd get asked why we didn't send them to the international school just 2 miles away when we were only here for two years.    While we didn't just pick the public school to make their lives 'hard', it was a definitely part of our consideration.  We wanted to integrate into Danish life...we wanted to make Danish friends and be motivated to learn the language.  International school just didn't mesh with our ultimate goals and wishes for our short time here.   

I won't sugar coat the first few months of school here.  They were ROUGH.  Daily complaints of:  'I miss my friends at home', 'I wish dad never took the job', even 'I hate it here'.  Refusals to try to learn Danish, refusals to try to speak it.  I started to lose hope and wondered if we had made the wrong decision...

But my boys, oh my sweet boys, they amazed me beyond my greatest expectations.  They complained but they didn't give up.  Max started to insist he needed to learn Danish so he could make friends in the neighborhood and play with them.  I can't even tell you how much it made my heart swell with pride to watch these boys walk so bravely into a classroom where they didn't know a single soul...or in the beginning, speak any of their language (nor they ours...except the teachers...English starts in 1st grade).  And yet day after day, week after week, they bravely went to school and tried their best.  Thinking about it now just makes me so incredibly proud of them and their strength, their tenacity, their bravado.  These boys took that mountain right in front of them and looked it straight in the eyes and then climbed it...and made it to the very summit!

Today we are nearly 10 months into our adventure here and Max is reading, writing, speaking and understanding Danish!  He's not quite up to grade level but he's doing a phenomenal job and even tested higher than expected on a Danish competence test and well above average on a national math test (part of which required reading instructions and a few problems in Danish).  Sam isn't far behind but he's been reluctant to speak Danish.  However in the last few weeks he's been trying to 'teach' me Danish (this is how Max started) and I've heard him speaking Danish at school and occasionally at home.  Ben speaks a mixture of Danish and English (sometimes in the same sentence).  He only is spoken to in Danish at his kindergarten and he responds in Danish there too.  

Today Max had his best friend over after school and my house was filled with excited talking in a language that I couldn't even understand.  Sam even joined in a bit!  It amazes me that in such a short time how far these boys have come and how much they've accomplished.  

Life is still going to have hard things in it.  It will never be simple or easy.  But I can always look back on this time and remember how this hard time went.  How, as much as I stressed about it, worried about it, cried about it, it turned out ok in the end.  My kids are champions.  They are resilient and brave and courageous and they didn't give up when the going got tough.  If ever there was a proud mom moment in my life...I think this one takes the cake.

Florida Vacation 2014 - Part 1

Our annual FL trip this year couldn't have come at a better time!  Temperatures in WI were dipping into double digits BELOW ZERO (and that wasn't even including the windchill)!!  Waking up at 3:30am was never more welcome than when you know in a few short hours you are going to escape the cold!

The boys were AWESOME travelers.  I know I always say that, but it is true!  No complaining when we had to wake up so early, just excited chatter from the backseat of the van on the way to the airport.  The older boys both navigated their own suitcases inside so I was able to check in 5 bags and a carseat all while pushing Ben in the stroller while Max was parking the car :).  The lady in line behind me asked me if I was very brave.  LOL  I told her that my husband was travelling with us too -- I can't imagine doing all that by myself!

We flew SouthWest this time, and although the airline is fine, I am not a fan of their boarding procedures.  Basically, they give you a number when you check in -- that number is directly correlated to when you check-in in relation to the other passengers.  A1 is the first number and C60 is the last.  Basically, they start boarding with A1 and you get on the plane and pick your seat.  If you are C60, you are pretty much SOL and have to find the last seat on the plane.  I checked in EXACTLY 24 hrs before our flight and got A60, B1, B2 and B3.  Seriously?  But even if we hadn't gotten such 'high' numbers, they do allow 'Family Boarding' at B1.  I just laughed and said if there weren't any seats together by the time we got on the plane someone else was going to have a very 'magical' flight.  But, there was no problem, and we got a row with 3 seats across (Mom with lap Ben, Sam and Max) and then big Max sat by himself.  The arrangement worked out perfectly in the end.  I'm sure big Max (who got some nice alone time on the flight) would agree. 

As you can see from the photo above, the olders behaved great on the flight.  I'm surprised no one actually fell asleep, but they didn't start to get restless until the last 30 mins, at which point the anticipation of landing was getting everyone on the flight restless anyways, so we fit right in.

Ben, on the other hand, took the opportunity to catch up on his zzzzs.  So I enjoyed a little snuggle time/

When we arrived, there was a NINETY-FOUR degree temperature difference!  Holy!

The boys took advantage of the warmth to enjoy a dip in the pool.  They sure love the water!

Grumpy took them down to the dock and cast his net and pulled it up chock full of mullets!

Apparently they didn't smell too good :)

And apparently Sam likes to imitate fish...

Then they checked the crab trap, but nothing was in there.

The next day, the temperatures took a little dip.  I hesitate to say it was cold, because it was still warm for us, but all the FL natives were bundled up in winter coats and hats and gloves, LOL.  We took the opportunity to go to the Fort Myers Imaginarium.  We went there 2 years ago, and not much had changed, but with the boys being older this time they enjoyed it much more.

We played around in the touch tank for awhile...they had starfish and hermit crabs that you could touch.

Then we got to touch the stingrays when they opened the stingray touch tank for a short while.

Granna and Grumps took the boys up to the hurricane simulator.  

And then we checked out the aquarium and reptile room.  Isn't this baby alligator cute?

So is this baby alligator :)

The rest of the museum was pretty fun also.  They had different stations where you could experiment with different things like magnets (as above), puzzles, gravity, etc.  It was a lot of fun for the boys and even for us adults!  Overall it was a great day and a great way to spend a 'chilly' day.  :)

Project 366: Week 43

295-301

295|366 - Oct 21, 2012 -- annual trip to the pumpkin farm!

296|366 - Oct 22, 2012 -- max practices his ABCs on the driveway

297|366 - Oct 23, 2012 -- prepping for an audit at work

298|366 - Oct 24, 2012 - sam helps out with the vacuuming.

299|366 - Oct 25, 2012 -- Max puts the primer on the door to prep for staining

300|366 - Oct 26, 2012 -- ever since her hair cut, Shiloh seems to be more of a lap cat

301|366 - Oct 27, 2012 - Max has his first friend sleepover (at our house)

Week 7: Project 366

Week 7 of Project 366!  I'm impressed I've made it this long!

43| 366 Playdate - Feb 12, 2012 - Nina came over for a Sunday morning playdate (or Sunday morning coffee talk for Mommy and Laura).  We're so lucky our kids get along so well.  (And yes I did finally put away all the xmas paraphenlia, so the card holder on the shelf behind them is now thankfully packed up until next year).

44 | 366 - Wrestling -  Feb 13, 2012  Sam is into all types of sports and "boy" activities.  Wrestling is one of his favorites.  He 'got me' here.

45 | 366 New Year's Resolutions - Feb 14, 2012.  I was waiting and waiting for school to send this piece of Little Max's artwork home with me.  His resolution for 2012 is to "clean the dishes and clean up the mess for 100 days".  What a goal setter, my son!

46 | 366 hearts - Feb 15, 2012.  Valentine's heart garland made out of paint chips.  LOVE it.  I will probably have this hanging until Easter.  :)

47 | 366 sucker  - Feb 16, 2012.  My little sucker eating a Valentine's day sucker after dinner.  He looks so grown up in this picture...and he really needs a haircut!

48 | 366 Tikka Masala - Feb 17, 2012.  I made this recipe after pinning it to my 'Crockpotting' board on Pinterest, and I was not impressed.  I did add lentils to it, but I don't think that was the issue.  I'm not ready to give up on Tikka Masala yet and will try another recipe first.  What this dinner WAS successful in doing, however, was giving me cravings for Ethiopian food.  I love going HERE...anyone want to join me?

49 | 366 stud - Feb 18, 2012 - My stud of a husband has decided to build me some shelving units in the basement. I am such a lucky girl! AND, he did it all in ONE DAY (without being asked). SWOON.

Betty Brinn

It has been awhile since we were last at the Betty Brinn Children's Museum -- the last time we were there, Sam was still in utero!

This time we met up with some co-workers and their adorable kiddos.  This is Angela -- can you believe she is only a month older than Sam -- look how mobile she is already!!

Sam had lots of fun in the "pre-school" area -- lots of things for the wee ones to play with...

Including these "musical mushrooms".  Sam is into ANYTHING musical -- especially if HE is the one MAKING the music.  He could've stayed here all morning long...

Max was busing playing 'newscaster' with Daddy and spelling his name with these magnets...

And then he found the train.  HE could've stayed HERE all morning long...

Mommy and Sam put on a little puppet show...

And then Sam tried to do a little rock climbing

 

After that, Daddy was teaching him the proper way to build a fire.

The entire morning was great.  The kids had a ton of fun, and Sam passed out before we had even left the parking garage -- SUCCESS!

T-ball

Our lives are uber busy right now.  Getting the house ready to go on the market (shooting for June), work, kids, extra curriculars.

So, I'm going to be short on words and just post some pictures. 

Here are some of Max's first T-ball lesson with the Brookfield Park and Rec department.  It is definitely hard to keep a group of 3-5 year olds in check...and to tell them where to run or throw a ball, but these guys did a pretty decent job.  And, lil Max appears to have a pretty decent arm on him....

Max's friend and neighbor, Owen, is taking the class with us.  Such a cutie!

Max is the eternal goofball....

Swing Batta!

Catching Flies (Video)

The video I promised:

Sticky Tongue

We love doing Zoo class -- not only because I work there and I know that it is a quality offering -- but also because lil Max thoroughly enjoys it and gets a lot out of it.

This week we did Snakes and Chameleons.  We made chameleon costumes, decorated pet snakes, and got to catch 'flies' with our 'chameleon tongues'.

Afterwards, we walked to the Aquatic and Reptile Center and met up with a zookeeper and a ball python.  The snake's name was Janice.  This tickled Max.  He still talks about Janice and asks me how she is doing.

When we got home, we had to show daddy just how to catch flies with our tongue:

I have a video too, but it is still uploading, so you'll have to wait for that one....