Sunday, October 10, 2010

The light of his life.....

wasn't me...at least not tonight.

Sorry folks, no photos or videos tonight. Just a little story that I wanted to go down in blog history.

I remember having many *moments* when nursing little Max right before bedtime.  The special moments we shared in the quiet darkness...tiny pauses from suckling to smile while milk dribbles down a cheek, blowing raspberries (and milk everywhere) instead of drinking....tiny little coos while nuzzling into my neck when being burped...so many *moments* that you just can't capture on any camera, but you want to brand in your memory forever....

Tonight, I had one of those moments with Sam.  Big brother Max was already in bed in the next room, and he had a fresh diaper (with LuSa booty balm slathered on...LOVE that stuff!) and new jammies on.  The white noise maker and humidifier were on...the drapes were drawn.....I settled us into the rocker, arranged the boppy pillow and made sure the burp rag was within reaching distance, and then Sam went to town like a voracious little suckerfish that hadn't eaten in weeks (I kid you not).  All of a sudden, he popped off and turned his head to stare up at the ceiling fan in the middle of the room.  The fan wasn't on, but the light was -- very dimly.  He then proceeded to talk to the light for the next 5 mins....

mmmm....booooooo.........

**smile**

hmmmmmm......heeeeeeeyyyyyyy.....

**smile**

mmmmmm.....baaaaaaaaa........

**smile**

bbbbbaaaaaaahhhh......mmmmhmmmmmdaaaaaaa

**smile**

all in this soft little whisper voice.....so sweet.....so angelic.......



but, for crying out LOUD, he was talking to a LIGHT.......



So, 5 minutes of this babbling goes by....I didn't know if I should try to distract him and get him to look at me, or -- if I had been in a rush -- to get him to turn back towards me to finish nursing so I could get to one of the gazillion chores I needed to finish before going to bed.....

Instead I just watched him babble away....he'd flash his sweet smile in between his babbles....he was really working on getting the 'b' sound out...sometimes just blowing air between his little lips while he sounded it out to himself....and then he'd smile again at the light and start babbling all over again...

It's so easy to rush on to the next chore, or to hurry through these everyday tasks to get to the finish line (aka bed)....but I'm a mom of 2 now...so I ALREADY know just how much I'd miss moments like this...because the kids won't be nursing forever....there will come a time when they won't want to sit in my lap (or sit STILL in my lap)....and they certainly won't be babbling at ceiling fans much longer....

So, instead, I sat there and watched him...and drank in the moment.  I watched his little lips and how he tasted the 'b' sound on them for the first time, and figured out how to purse his lips just right to get his breath to flow through them.....I watched the little smiles light up his face......I watched him tell that ceiling fan all these wonderful stories and wondered to myself what he thought was up there that he was talking to.....and I smelled the sweet baby smell wafting up from his freshly washed head....and I was thankful for the moments I DO get to have with my kids....all the wonderful, simple, and plain moments....the ones that LIFE is made up of....

It really was a sweet moment....

too bad the smiles and babbles weren't for me....

maybe another night I'll get to be the light of his life....for that mini-moment in time, at least....

5 comments:

Megan said...

I love it, Stef. What a great story to capture!

monnie halberg said...

You ARE the light of his life. Sometimes lights are distracting though ;) They are for my little one too. Great post though. Thanks for helping me stop and smell the roses. I feel the same way and it has been much easier waking with Tess because of it (even if it is the 3rd time in the middle of the night, which seems to be happening a lot lately!) But there's so much to do and in the scheme of things, so little time to enjoy the little moments!

mel said...

Happy tears for your special time with Sam. You said it beautifully.

Emily said...

What a wonderful story to put down in words and treasure forever!! So sweet :)

Amanda said...

This is so true. Drink it in, soak it up. Time is so precious and I'm learning that more and more as we get older. What a terrific excuse you have to slow down for a moment! Love you.